Full list of jokes
|The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said, "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will.""That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to make a little change."Link to joke: |The patient shook his doctor's hand...
|A doctor and a nurse were called to the scene of an accident.Doctor: We need to get these people to a hospital now!Nurse: What is it?Doctor: It's a big building with a lot of doctors, but that's not important now!Link to joke: |A doctor and a nurse were...
|A burglary was recently committed at West Ham's ground and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are looking for a man with a claret & blue carpet.Link to joke: |A burglary was recently committed at...
A couple was having some trouble, so they did the rightthing and went to a marriage counselor. After a few visits,and a lot of questioning and listening, the counselor saidthat he had discovered the main problem. He stood up, went over to the woman, asked her to stand,and gave her a hug. He looked at the man and said, "thisis what your wife needs, at least once a day!" The man frowned, thought for a moment, then said, "Ok, whattime do you want me to bring her back tomorrow?"Link to joke: A couple was having some trouble,...
She: What do you love most, my natural beauty or my body?He: Your sense of humor.Link to joke: She: What do you love most,...
A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seatnext to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face wasplastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin wassticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaperand began reading. After a few minutes the disheveled guy turnedto the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?""My son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wickedwomen, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man.""Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man andapologized. "I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong.How long have you had arthritis?""I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."Link to joke: A man who smelled like a...
What did God say after creating man? "I can do better"Link to joke: What did God say after creating...
"Oh love, what did you ever do to deserve a wife like me?"she said looking lovingly into her husbands eyes."I don't know, but I promise I'll never do it again."Link to joke: "Oh love, what did you ever...
Q: What did Jesus do when he got to the Holiday Inn?A: He threw some nails down on the counter and asked, "Can you put me up for the night?"Link to joke: Q: What did Jesus do when...
What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet? The Captain's log.Link to joke: What did Mr. Spock find in...
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